Wednesday, 7 October 2015

Please check my snap story


I'm pathetic.  I know I am.  It's like I've reincarnated part of my immature Year 8 self, who wanted everyone to know when she met up with people.  It's not so much meeting up anymore, but it's like I want everyone to know how much fun I'm having.  I refresh and refresh my snapchat story views to see whether particular people have seen the obscure thing I did earlier today, or that really funny thing that happened.

It's like when something hilarious happened in the break room at work.  I videoed it for snapchat just so that people would know that hey, I have fun at work, not that it should be any of their business.  I don't even know what my mentality there was.  Why should I care whether they know what I do at work?  Is it because I want them to envy my job and how I spend my time?  Is it because I want them to think I'm fun?  All these reasons are immensely stupid.

And when that particular person doesn't see my snap story before it disappears, I'm like seriously?  You had 24 hours.  But why did I notice they didn't notice?  How can certain people have so much power over me?

I know I'm becoming obsessive, and I know I should be able to have fun just for the sake of having fun, but I'm not even making a conscious effort to stop this ridiculousness.  It seems to be working for me, so I keep posting and I keep refreshing.  I don't even know if I want to end my stories, or if there's anything wrong with them.  I think what's wrong here is that I care what these people think.  It's okay to share what I'm doing, but it's not okay to wish that a certain person would just view my story, because I don't need their validation.

Having fun should be about having fun, and this translates to outside snapchat as well (because shock horror, the world doesn't revolve around snapchat - that was more for me than you).  I don't know why I feel the need to tell stories of stuff that happened in the past in a way that makes me seem exciting, more adventurous.  I don't know why I feel the need to share stuff that has absolutely no relevance sometimes.

How about we try breaking down the reasoning for this behaviour here:

Okay, so it could be about making myself look better, like I lead a more impressive life.  But they say that best friends are the people you don't need to impress, so it's absolutely saddening if I feel the need to impress everybody, because that would mean I have no best friends.  But then, I've shared some incredibly unimpressive stuff with some of my best friends as well, so maybe I'm just being myself by showing them both sides.  It's the other people that I might be trying to impress?

Or maybe I'm trying to make them feel worse about themselves by showing them that I'm with this person doing this, and they're not.  But now misanthropic is that?  What kind of reasoning is that?

Maybe snapchat is like my diary or this blog in a way.  It's like I have the second nature to document everything.  It's like I can't simply just live in the moment.  If I'm having an amazing time, I need to document it somewhere, and what's the point of taking photos if no one is able to see them?  But shouldn't I be content with doing all this for myself?  What's wrong with me keeping these memories personally to look back on?  How does this have any relevance to anyone else besides the people who were there?

But in the same way, I feel like everyone treats snapchat in this manner.  I mean, I can't think of a single other use for snap stories other than sharing with people what you're doing.  If you're in a different country, working out, standing in front of a beautiful view, with someone who's looking on point; aren't all these instances snapchat worthy?  I think it's fine to share what you're doing with other people, but obsessing over what these other people think is when it becomes negative.

There's a fine line between positive sharing and obsessiveness with social media, and I'm absolutely terrible at staying on the right side.

Love,
M

12 comments:

  1. I like to document things, too it's almost like if I don't have a picture or something it didn't happen.

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    1. Exactly! You know how they say you should watch the concert rather than film it? Well sometimes when you're watching something that exciting all you want to do is capture every moment. In some ways it's like we're living in the future rather than the present.

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  2. I'm exactly the same. I want people to know that I'm having fun and I guess I want them to be jealous. Yep, I'm that sad. Bye.

    Love, Mia

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    1. I'm sometimes that sad too, but the really sad thing is that we're not making an effort to change our mentality.

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  3. I am guilty of doing the same thing on Snapchat. It almost seems as Snapchat wants you to do that, or you do it because your friends are doing the same thing. I like the Snap you shared with us in this post.
    -Vanessa

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    1. While writing this post I realised that what else would we use snapchat for? So I guess social media really is all about showing other people how much fun you're having, and then obsessing over who sees it. Or maybe that last part is just for unhealthily self conscious people like me. Thank you Vanessa. It was a good day x

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    2. From one M to another, that is so so true! I was thinking the same thing today.

      thatladym.blogspot.com

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    3. Hahaha I was looking at the commenters on my 'Published Comments' page and got so confused because someone named M had commented, and I thought I'd been hacked or something :'). But yes, something as simple as social media is complicated like that.

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  4. I used to do this exact same thing on Snapchat - but then I realized I was putting so much energy into something pointless. Now I only use Snapchat to send photos to specific friends and I don't bother with having a story :-)

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    1. I still like having a story, but I feel like it's more about training yourself not to care about how much people know about you. Or maybe I'm just making excuses because I find it too hard to let go of this bad habit. Snapchat's soul purpose really is to message specific friends though. I admire your will power.

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  5. Everyone, and I repeat, EVERYONE, does this on Snapchat, Instagram, Facebook, you name it. It's some kind of psychological thing, you know? Like, look at me, my selfie is way prettier than yours (just don't tell them there's five filters and it took seventeen tries). Look, I'm having such a fun time with my best friends at the mall (but really we just got ice cream and tried to figure out the best way to split the bill). LOOK AT ME I'M RUNNING I'M MORE ACTIVE THAN YOU, more social than you, I have more, I do more. It's crazy. I think we'd have a lot more fun if we all stopped trying to make it look that way.

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    1. I feel like life has always been a competition, but social media has been a way to make it even more so, because we're able to show people every one of our highlight moments, and we're able to peek into what everyone else is doing. We're so much more exposed, and so much more narcissistic. It's unhealthy but it's culture, and it's addictive.

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