Wednesday, 3 June 2015
Assessment is Over(rated)
Maths is getting harder and I'm getting worried.
It's not healthy to be this lazy, to hate school this much. I need to snap back into it, in time for this super difficult maths test tomorrow.
I'm feeling pretty calm. I think it's time to focus on school - get through the next three weeks and I'll officially be done. There's really nothing I should be worrying about because life is working out fine, and people will be people and the world keeps moving. It's rather boring but overly complex all at the same time. I've decided that classes are interesting, and learning is a blessing.
From now on it's assessment and nothing else. I seriously need to focus because I feel as if I'm slipping. And without good grades, what am I?
But anyway, this coming week has 6 assessments so I've got too many things to do. There's no time for trivial issues and trivial people.
I really just want assessment to be over. My grades aren't looking too great this semester, but I've got to look towards the rest of assessment before even thinking about the disappointment.
The motivation to do well is there, but at the same time, sometimes when the time comes I'm just so lazy. How will I cope next year? I feel as if I have too much confidence in my abilities, and that can only lead to shamed arrogance and disappointment in the end.
Assessment finally ended today, and I feel like celebrating.
In the past two weeks though, the two heaviest assessment weeks I think I've ever had, I noticed some eye-roll-worthy behaviour amongst friends, acquaintances, and myself. We just make such a big deal out of all our tests and getting marks back, and we all have different behaviours and emotions and, I mean, I get that grades and stuff matter (even though we're in year 10 and it seriously doesn't go towards anything yet), but should it really influence our lives that much?
One time my friend got her maths test result back and she wouldn't talk to anyone for the next three hours. She acted completely utterly depressed, and is a test really worth it?
In the maths test last week, in fact, quite a few people broke down in a panicked state.
After the commerce test another one of my friends dwelled on it all through lunch - That's over an hour of dwelling.
There's the competition for some, and the embarrassment for others, and the anticipation before getting a mark back, letting that mark dictate your mood.
Sometimes these people take assessment too seriously, as if it's the only thing on their minds. Yes, studying is necessary. But is it really necessary to hyperventilate, break down, affect your mood, let the test be the only thing you notice in your day, pretend you don't care when you actually do (a lot) for the sake of image, or talk about it for ages? The question is: Why do we care so freaking much!? Yes, good grades and education are important, but I wouldn't call any of it the priority of life.
What happened to the prospect of simply learning